Fearing Opportunities: Part I

It amazes me how so many young professionals, including myself, fear opportunities. It’s almost like an oxymoron, quite frankly, and it shouldn’t exist.

So where does this fear come from? I don’t have the answer to that question but I do have a theory:

I truly believe our generation is bombarded with so much information that we now have so many different ways of looking at things that we end up overthinking the simplest solution to our problems. And with that being said, we fear the greatest opportunities that cross our lives because we over think every scenario that could possibly happen if we seize that opportunity – and the thought that holds us back from taking that opportunity is the thought of “what could possibly go wrong”.

We get so caught up with the “bad”, that we don’t acknowledge the good that can possibly come out of it. And most of the time, the good outweighs the bad. The answer is really simple. And we see it. But we choose to live in some superficial fear.

So how do I relate? If you recall from my previous post, I wanted to take acting classes because I wanted to build self-confidence in a fun and practical setting. As much as it is for me, I wanted my readers like yourself to follow in on this journey and laugh with me about my experiences. So I felt like I owed it to you as much as I owed it to myself.

I found the perfect studio that accepts absolute beginners like myself who just want to do it for fun. I was excited when I found it. I even daydreamed about how awesome I would be – how embarrassing right? As soon as I was about to commit to it, I held back. I kept thinking – what if I’m absolutely horrible? What if I’m surrounded by people who were born to be Hollywood stars and weren’t absolute beginners like me? Do I really want to spend THAT much money to boost self-confidence?

One bad thought became an endless vicious cycle of every negative thought I could create I lost full control of the benefits in taking this opportunity.

So where am I now with this situation? I’ve decided to face my fear head-on and just visit the studio. There’s no harm in seeing what its like and asking questions to be more informed about my decision. And there’s no need to have fear.

Unfortunately I have a two-day professional exam next week so this story will be continued.

The Truth

I have a confession.  I truly believe my breakdown this year was caused by my unfulfilled life since high school – and not the events in my life that happened just recently. As I was reading Louise L. Hay’s “You Can Heal Your Life”, she stated in the very beginning that our thoughts in the past has brought us to where we are now. It took me awhile to really define where in my past led me to this path. But I eventually realized that it had really nothing to do with my job, family, or personal issues at this moment.

The Truth. My parents came into Canada as refugees: no money, no stable job, and a lot of hardship. As I was growing up, I played only with dolls and my piano because my parents could not afford to have me partake in any extra-curricular activities. All my other friends had ballet, swimming, soccer, basketball, dance, and so on and so forth. By the time I hit my preteens, I really felt like a Plain Jane: average, untalented, and most of all, boring.

Compensation. Because I didn’t feel like I had anything going for me, I consumed myself in thoughts of another me, who was talented, beautiful, smart, and sophisticated. Some days I pictured myself as a dancer, some days I pictured myself as a hero,  or some days I even pictured myself as an actress. It’s one thing to daydream about a silly crush or who we will be in the next 10 years, but it’s another to completely imagine another self beyond reality and believing I will never be that person because it’s only just a dream.

Reality check. Since reading Hay’s book, that “other self” is ceasing to exist because I am now on that path of living a fulfilled life just by changing my thoughts. I can be who I want to be now, if I wanted too. I may have not had the opportunity to take dance classes or even acting classes as a child, but it’s not too late now. Afterall, I’m only 24!

Action plan. I find myself enjoying new ways of expressing myself and I think taking on acting and dance classes will enhance that skillset. I think it’s time that I break that invisible shell and open up to new experiences and new faces. To my young female professionals, it’s time to break free. Follow with me on this path.