For the last month, I’ve been preparing my two-day professional accounting exam, 7 days a week, 8 hours a day. [Yeah, I’m still doing this accounting gig.] I knew by the end of it, I just had to celebrate and go away for a bit. I spontaneously took an extended leave of absence from work and booked my LA trip with my study buddies.
I’ve been to LA numerous times in my life. Coming back to LA always felt like I was coming home. Toronto has and will always be my first home. But there is no other city other than LA that I have returned so frequently too. Ever since my first trip in LA, at the age of 7, I didn’t hesitate a second to believe that I could see myself live here.
Whether it be the weather, the palm trees, the friendly people, the celebrities or the fashion, everything seems so much brighter, fullfilling, and content in the City of Angels.
At the end of the trip, I told myself I’m coming back to LA again – but this time, I’ll have a job there. Who knows what or where I’ll be working, I just know I have to go back for a purpose this time. And I’m going to make it come true.
I know where I am right now isn’t exactly where I want to be. Today – especially – proved my point. To be honest, it wasn’t a terrible day at all. It was my first day back at work from my study leave and I just felt “not right” about it. Something was off. And I was nervous – like it was almost my first day at the job altogether. I caught my hands shaking out of no where and I told myself to stop. I told myself to stop being nervous and that there was and is nothing to be nervous about. It was such a strange feeling. I couldn’t explain why this was happening to me. This situation sounds silly come to think of it. But I know deep down that I have something bigger and brighter in my future and being here right now in Toronto doesn’t seem to cut it for me anymore.
I really have to take time to pour out my thoughts in an organized fashion because I feel like a loose cannon right now. For now, I just need to catch up on some rest.